2018 Family Moto

35 They were desirous to be baptized as a witness and a testimony that they were willing to serve God with all their hearts; Mosiah 21:35

"Make sure they remember joy yesterday, experience joy today, and anticipate joy tomorrow."

Motherhood Mission Statement

To provide a loving environment that is centered around God and His commandments while effectively teaching my children to love, honor, and respect all Men no matter the race, creed, or background.

Click on Nolen's name to hear our amazing journey through autism.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Give Away!

Another wonderful give away from CSN stores! You could be the lucky winner of a $45 dollar gift card to use on any of the CSN websites! They include a briefcase, baby cribs, and anything for your home.

To enter just leave a comment with your email address! The contest ends November 30th at midnight so get your name in early! Good Luck!

Friday, November 19, 2010

Labor and Delivary in a nutshell...

I hired a Doula!

Sunday morning around 3am I woke up with slight to moderate contractions that were ten minutes apart. I couldn't really sleep so I went downstairs and tried to read a book. I had been trying to finish "Man of the Family" by Ralph Moody before the baby arrived. I started reading and soon felt tired enough to sleep through my contractions.
8:00 AM I put together Stephen's lunch for work and told him I thought the baby was going to come tonight. I even sent a text to my Mom saying I thought the baby was coming. I went upstairs to take a shower for church and my contractions totally stopped. I got Edward totally ready to go and we headed out for Sacrament. Church seemed to be what tipped me over the edge, if you really want to know. Edward was especially rambunctious and wanted to visit every single person who attended sacrament that day. He even started screaming "CAR" from the top of his lungs towards the end of the meeting. I have a rule that we stay in sacrament as long as possible so I stayed while he yelled until the older woman in front of us turned around and "shsh"ed us. So I left. I was so angry. I walked in to the hall and said, "I hate this ward". Ugh! I guess my hormones and emotions were running high.
10:00 AM I went to nursery and did my job as best I could. I probably wasn't much help but I was there. The usual nursery leader was not there and she didn't have a replacement. So two of us took care of eleven two year olds. YIKES!
12:30 PM I drove Edward home and put him to bed as I started to feel contractions again. I decided not to time them because they were most likely going to go away. I went down stairs and read my book while feeling some very uncomfortable pain.
3:30 PM Stephen arrived home from work and I told him my contractions were back. Stephen had forgotten his cell phone at home and somehow managed to come back home and pick it up with out my knowledge. He must have had a feeling the baby was coming too. Stephen cooked dinner, potatoes and brawts, one of my favorite meals. I sat on the floor watching Toy Story Three while my contractions started to get closer together and more uncomfortable.
7:00 PM I decide that my contractions are not going away so I talk to my Mom and tell her that the baby is coming tomorrow. I have stopped timing my contractions because I know that while I was in labor with Edward it only made it worse to time them and know when the next one was coming. So while in labor I just let the pain come and go. I just took deep even breathes as the pain increased.
8:00 PM Stephen put Edward down for bed and I decided to go and take a LONG luxurious bath. We have a jacuzzi tub and I figured this would be the perfect time to utilize the asset. I took my book upstairs and put bubbles in the tub and turned off all the lights except for one right over the tub. I am not really sure how long I soaked in the tub but it was a while. I called my neighbor, Sarah Tasker, to ask her if she wouldn't mind spending the night with Edward while Stephen and I went to the hospital to check and see if they would admit me. She said to let her know when to come over.
9:00 PM I called the doula to let her know that we were in labor and that I was sure we would be heading to the hospital at midnight.
9:30 PM I am still in the tub reading my book and breathing through some intense contractions. I really didn't want to go to the hospital and have them turn me away. I just wanted to labor at home as long as I possibly could. Reading my book between contractions was the best idea. It totally took my mind off what was happening with my body. I would stop reading while I felt pain and breath then start back where I left off. The jacuzzi tub was 100% relaxing.
10:30 PM I get the feeling I need to get out of the tub. I brush my teeth, take out my contacts and Stephen walks in to the room and says he is all packed up and ready to go. I say, "Ok, lets call the doula and have her meet us here, then we can discuss our options." As I am getting dressed, Stephen called the Doula, Michelle, and he said we would meet her at the hospital. I started thinking about my pain and I guess Stephen saw my face and we decided it would be better to just meet her at the hospital.
10:45 PM Sarah and Spencer Tasker arrive at the house as I am downstairs feeling more and more pain. I am really hoping, at this point, that my body is dilating. I grab my big water jug and head to the car. I think about sitting on the seat, but I can't. I just can't. So I kneel down on the floorboard with my elbows rested on the seat. Every bump is EXCRUCIATING!! The seat makes an annoying beeping noise because I don't have my seat belt fastened. I fasten it.
11:00 PM We arrive at the hospital and I am surprised that I can not even WALK! I am having contractions that are very close together. Each step I take has to be really fast so that I can stop and squeeze Stephen's arm while I feel the pain. Somehow we make it to the door, then to the elevator. By the time we are on the third floor I am really feeling like a wuss. I am trying hard to be calm but my pain level is at a 9.5.
11:15 PM The nurse makes me undress and lay on the bed. I HATE LAYING ON THE BED! So much more pain when you lay down!! She checks me. I am 5-6 centimeters dilated!! I should celebrate, but I cry instead. I know that I have 4-5 more centimeters to go! My Doula arrives! The nurse tries to keep my laying down, but that is impossible with the amount of pain I am in. She puts a monitor on my stomach so she can check the babies heart beat. I had to wear the monitor for TWENTY MINUTES!! By this time I am starting to really make a lot of noise through my contractions, it seems to help me focus on the sound and not the pain. The nurse tells me I need to try to be quiet. HA HA HA! The Doula tells me I can be as loud as I want. Those were the longest most excruciating minutes of my life. The doula is rubbing my back and telling me to relax my shoulders. She is talking so softly. I am really trying to relax, but I have to admit, I didn't relax at all.
11:35 PM Finally the nurse says the baby is doing fine and the Doula has filled up the bath tub. I walk in to the bathroom and take off my silly hospital robe and jump in. The lights are off and there are flameless candles burning. I can smell vanilla. I try kneeling but my legs went numb right away. I sat down and just listened to the water and to my Doula's voice. She kept rubbing my back and talking to me softly. I started to sing scream through each contraction. I was literally screaming and singing at the same time.
12:00 AM The doula wants me to try another position, so I get back on my knees then I put my arms on the edge of the tub. WORSE! The pain is WAY WORSE!! WAY WORSE! I start screaming for my epidural and any pain meds that are available. The doula asks Stephen what kind of drugs we talked about taking. He says, "Give her whatever she wants!" I kneel again and that is when something changed. My sing scream turned into a grunt. A long grunt. My body was pushing on its own. The Doula tells Stephen to push the nurse button. Then she says, "ok, you need to get out of the tub." I can't. I just can't stand up. I can't lift my leg over the tub. I dig my nails in to her arm and start to panic. I am not ready! I am not ready! I tell her I am going to die and that I want my pain meds. She says, "It is too late the baby is coming now." She says everything so calm. I start to take a step away from the tub and I see 5 nurses and a doctor headed my way. They look panicked. They ask me to get to the bed. YEAH RIGHT! I take another step and I am pushing uncontrollably. The nurses lay papers down on the floor as I try to walk and scream at the same time. I am so so so so scared at this point. I can't make to the bed and I can't have the baby standing up. Somehow I walk to the bed. Trust me, I was screaming all the way. I get to the bed and think, "there is no way I am laying down to have this baby!" So I kneel on the floor with my arms stretched over the bed. One nurse grabs my arms as I scream, "I am going to die!!"
Not sure about the time.... I continue pushing and I can literally feel the baby coming down. I can feel him so well that I stop and clamp up. Then I feel another contraction and decide that was a bad idea. I have to push him out, there is no other way. I scream, "CUT HIM OUT!" I push one long hard push and I hear the doctor say, "here is his head." My doula says softly, "ok, small pushes now." I push. I push and I push. I can feel him coming out and I feel a HUGE sense of relief.
12:18 AM Nolen William Barnes is born. Stephen cuts the umbilical cord and I stand up just to lay down on the bed. I wait for about 10 minutes until the placenta comes out. Then I start shaking. Finally a nurse puts two blankets over me after the doctor says I haven't torn a bit. The doula is praising me and I am smiling. I am actually smiling! The worst is over. I did it! I did it all Natural! I made it through. I did something only a handful of women will ever try in their lives. I did it!
2:00 AM We, including Nolen, are wheeled into our room upstairs and now we can relax. YEAH RIGHT, who ever said you could go to the hospital to relax? Either way, things worked out amazing and I have to thank my Doula, Michelle! She did amazing. I met her one time and expected to meet her many times the next week before the baby came. I am so glad things went so well. This was an amazing spiritual experience that I will never forget.
Welcome Baby Nolen!


Nolen William Barnes

Arrived at 12:18 AM on November 15, 2010

Weighing 7 pounds 5 Ounces and 20 Inches Long!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Up and Down and Up and right back Down

Have you ever wondered why things just don't work out how you plan? Well Stephen and I have been trying to purchase a home for the last two months. We haven't had any luck. I guess when it comes down to it, luck isn't necessary. We had our eye on the most beautiful home that would fit our family needs but would really stretch our family budget. I prayed countless days about this house and had such a great feeling; however, we didn't qualify for the loan.
I was on such a high when everything was working out and I was totally determined to make sure we had enough money to budget in a new house payment. I truly believe this is the Lord's way of telling me that we need to find something that will suit our needs but not stretch our budget quite as far. I have felt so many ups and downs while through it all I have been PREGNANT!
We have decided to rent for another year and maybe when things calm down a bit in our lives, i.e. we have the baby, we can start to look for our home of happiness.
In the mean time, I have decided to learn to LOVE Albuquerque and LOVE the small blessings in my life. Even if that means we live 25 minutes from town. There has to be someone out there who would like to be my friend... right?

Friday, November 12, 2010

Grandma B and Riley

Ask and we shall recieve! I literally beg people to come and visit us here in Albuquerque. I miss my family so much and it is incredibly hard to travel while pregnant and with a 1 year old. We have had many visits from Grandma's and Grandpa! We are truly blessed!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Loyalty and Ken Skousen

Loyalty: Faithfulness to commitments or obligations. The definition of loyalty should also include a brief biography of Ken Skousen. This word accurately describes a man who would do anything to help his Country, County, Community, Children, and most of all, his Wife. Ken Skousen has spent his career as a lawyer cleaning up the streets of Mohave County to make it safer for the community. He has tried countless cases of hardened criminals and thrown them in prison for the heinous crimes they have committed.
As a young man and father, Ken Skousen worked his way through Law School while running a Dairy farm in a small town just outside Phoenix, Arizona. His devotion to helping others started at an early age as he provided for his family of five children while milking cows and studying the law. He would rise early to feed and milk the cows then drive the 40 minute commute to ASU to study. Upon graduation, Ken acquired a job in the quaint town of Kingman, Arizona. He had already picked up the title of “workaholic” long before his days as a prosecutor. His long hours on the farm and in the classroom have paid off to help the community of Kingman.
Ken has shown his ability, time and time again, to put in more man hours than humanly possible. A typical day for Ken involves waking up around Seven AM and heading in to work. After a long day at work he can be seen on the soccer field with his grandchildren coaching them to excellence. Once he is home from work he spends time with his favorite past time; horses. This outside labor also includes pulling weeds from the garden and plowing the arena. Around Nine o’clock at night Ken heads back in to work to prepare for the next big trial. When does he sleep? That question has often been wondered by his wife and family.
Growing up with my loyal father, I have had the great benefit to see how a man should work and treat his obligations. My father has been a man of trust, a man that works, and most of all a man that loves. We have spent countless hours as children on the road early Saturday mornings to arrive at a rodeo on time. After a long weekend riding horses, my father would pack up the trailer and drive us home just so he could go right in to work early Monday morning. While riding with my father in the truck to each rodeo we would hear stories about his miraculous childhood and the history of our grandparents. My Dad would talk for hours about how we need to work hard as children to become successful adults. This precious time with my father has taught me that I, too, need to own up to all responsibilities without shying away from the hard things in life.
My father has also been a great man in his religious duties to God as well. He has held many time consuming jobs in the church that have ultimately bettered the community. He has worked with people who have needed more than they will ever be able to give. He has given many hours of labor to help those in need and to keep many from suffering.
My father is first and foremost, a husband. He works so that he can spend time with his Wife. Together my parents have raised 5 strong children who have each gone on to become successful adults. Ken has loved his wife most of all and has shown us children and the people around him exactly what a loving husband should be. He is a true example of a man. He is loyal.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Dear America,

Freedom of speech. Is that real? Can we really count on our freedom to speak our mind? Or is it a limited freedom? Well, I am going to take my chances, besides, who really reads my blog anyway?

For starters, my thoughts come from one source. The grocery store. As I was walking out of our upscale Albertson's I noticed shopping carts everywhere. These shopping carts were not even close to their designated parking spot. The shopping carts were littered throughout the parking lot. Then I thought, "Are we Americans really that lazy? We can't even walk ten feet to the shopping cart holster and put our cart away?" The real answer here is a resounding "YES, WE ARE THAT LAZY!"

So I started thinking about the guy or gal who was hired to round up the shopping carts and bring them back in to the store just so that I could conveniently grab it and walk through the store just to leave it whirling down the street outside. This guy or gal is paid to pick up our little mess, if you will, just to go back outside no matter what the weather is and do it again.

This train of thought led me to another thought. Americans. We live in a day and age where everything is fast and convenient. I admit, I love it. I love that if I need something I can just jump in my car and pick it up somewhere no matter the hour or distance. We sure are spoiled.

On that thought, I can't help but think about how we EXPECT our lives to be made even easier by ONE person. For example, this is something I over heard in passing, "I don't have to worry about the gas prices going up, Obama is going take of it for me." IS HE? REALLY? No, I don't think so. Why are we resting all of our hopes and dreams on ONE PERSON, or a handful of people for that matter. Do we really think that all of our problems are going to be solved by the new politician we voted for? Isn't the old saying completely true, "if you want something done you have to do it yourself"?

That statement is true for me. I am no longer going to sit idly by and expect new laws and new governor's to change my destiny. What foolish thinking! We, lazy, Americans need to actually get out and help one another rather than expecting someone else to do it for us.

I guess what I am saying is, I can no longer expect the right thing to be done by those in power because, after all, they are only human. Politicians have no idea what my needs are and for that matter I doubt they really care. However, I know what my neighbors needs are and I care enough to help him out.

I will start small and help my family, as they are most important to me, and grow from there. If we all took a moment to change our mindset, "the government will save me", maybe we would start to realize that only we can save ourselves. Instead of taking so much from one another, how about we just give and help as best we can? Is that asking too much from America? Not in my eyes.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Gma and Gpa Skousen come for a visit!

We were so blessed to have my parents come to Albuquerque for a visit. We went to a fun pumpkin patch and played all day and all night. I think they were completely worn out when they finally got home to Kingman because they took the next day off from work.