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35 They were desirous to be baptized as a witness and a testimony that they were willing to serve God with all their hearts; Mosiah 21:35

"Make sure they remember joy yesterday, experience joy today, and anticipate joy tomorrow."

Motherhood Mission Statement

To provide a loving environment that is centered around God and His commandments while effectively teaching my children to love, honor, and respect all Men no matter the race, creed, or background.

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Saturday, May 7, 2016

Let boys be boys

Deep breath.  It's all going to be OK.  A few weeks ago, I took Edward in to see a psychologist.  Is that crazy?  Do I worry too much?  Probably.  After a few visits, a form filled out by Edward's teacher, a form filled out by me, and a form filled out by Stephen; the psychologist thinks Edward has ADHD and wants to put him on medicine.  Can I catch a break?  I opted out of the medicine.  I can't.  I just can't.  He's too little.  
Here's my reasoning and you may not agree (or you may agree).  In this crazy world of sit still, be quiet, don't talk, don't have an opinion, don't say no, and certainly don't be an individual; I think we have put too many labels on people and too many walls up for kids.  They can't think for themselves  They can't act for themselves and heaven forbid they EVER make a mistake.  Ever!  
I am sick of it!  Let boys be boys!  Let kids be kids!  Let them make mistakes while we can guide and mold them rather than pushing medicine on them right away.  Let people make mistakes!  PLEASE!  I make so many mistakes a day.  I am so imperfect it's laughable.  Let the kids have a bad day and let them express their opinion.  I am not about to allow my children to become sheeple!!  I'm not.  I won't allow it.
I do apologize if my son is hard to handle in school.  Wouldn't it be great if every single kid did what you said and you never had to correct them and they just followed every single rule?  Sure, that would make the teacher's lives SO much easier.  But I am of the opinion that teachers are there to teach EVERY SINGLE CHILD!  To help every single child in the classroom.  NOT just the smartest and the easy going child.  Teachers are there to help ALL CHILDREN!  Would my life be easier if my boys agreed to everything I said and just did what I said because I said it?  YES!  But do I want that for them?  NO!  
So, today, I let my boys be boys.  They can not back talk or sass.  They can not be disrespectful.  BUT they can express their opinion and ask "WHY?"  If I stop them from asking, then they will become followers and, frankly, I don't want that.  I have never been, nor will I ever be, a follower.  If you don't want to go where I go, then forge your own path! 
Today, my boys play outside using their creativity.
Today, they are individuals.


Sandy said...

Oh Julie... I completely agree... boys will be boys and they are natural ways to work through it. I'm sure Jared and I both have some form of ADHD... or ADD... but we survived growing up without meds and still do. Landon no longer takes anything and does way better than he did before while taking meds. He just needs someone to listen to him and to talk things out with him. I think you made a great choice! Edward will learn to deal with it the natural way... definitely let boys be boys!

Paul and Aliisa said...

Avoid the drugs for sure! Make sure that after school or before school he is able to get lots of energy and creativity out. They have so much structure at school there needs to be an outlet. I'm curious, what makes him difficult at school? I substitute teach a lot and I do know that you cannot stop a classroom to cater to one or two children so there is a lot of pressure as a teacher. What are ways to make it easier on both the teacher and Edward?

Andrea Landaker said...

Yeah, I'd be wary of ADHD meds - they certainly help some people, but if you can do without them, I think it's better, too. Good for Edward that he's asking questions! I hope he gets good teachers that answer his questions and help him channel those questions into great learning!