Twelve years ago, I married the man of my dreams in the San Diego Temple. We were the last ceremony of the evening. We flew to San Diego with my parents and Stephen's parents earlier that morning. We checked in to our hotel then preceded to get ready. We rode to the temple together and then separated so that we could get dressed. I remember putting on my wedding dress and crying with my Mom in the bridal suit. I met Stephen at the grand stair case in the temple. It was beautiful. We cried and then Stephen stepped on my dress and busted the bustle. The temple has some very strict rules about what you wear and you can not have a train on your dress. So, someone had to find a safety pin to pin back up my dress. I wasn't a big fan on the train on my dress, but that is how it came. We were sealed for time and all eternity in front of just our parents and the temple worker. It was beautiful. It was everything I ever wanted. Afterward, there was a bit of a mix up and the temple workers wouldn't let me go out side with out my Mom, who was outside waiting for me. HA! I waited an hour for her to come back in but she never did. As all of the chaos was happening, the sun went down and it started raining. I was finally able to go out side and we took a few pictures before we headed out to dinner. I don't even remember where we ate, but it was delicious and fun. The next morning, we flew back to Arizona to celebrate with our close friends and family.
There are so many things that I love about my marriage. In the last 12 years, we really have been through some hard things. I could not have gone through these things alone. Some of these things, we have brought on ourselves and some things just happened to us. Stephen has been by my side for everything. He is my best friend. He is my silent partner in life. We understand each other.
Our first year of marriage was difficult. We had a hard time adjusting to married life. We had been on our own for 25 years and joining two lives wasn't as easy as everyone (or the movies) made it look. We fought. A lot. I have been told I am difficult. Ha ha ha!
After three years of figuring each other out we bought a house, we moved to New Mexico, we pushed each other to get through school, and we added two sweet baby boys to our family. We short sold a house, we bought another house, we had to come up with a new plan after the helicopter school Stephen attended declared bankruptcy. We borrowed lots of money, we made new friends, we laughed, I was diagnosed with cervical cancer pre-cells that just wouldn't go away, Nolen was diagnosed with autism, Stephen went through a very traumatic incident at work, and we borrowed more money. Stephen stepped away from the church, I started a business, we worked tirelessly together to adjust to our new normal with a child with autism, we followed all the promptings from God to help Nolen learn, we have taken tons of fun family vacations, we have played freeze tag more times than I can count, we stay up late watching television, and we learned how to fight with grace.
There are so many things that have happened in the last 12 years that are worth mentioning and some things that are private; however, the most important thing that I have learned over the last 12 years is to love more.
I love Stephen.
Twelve years ago, I am unsure if I really understood what it meant to truly love someone. I knew I loved my parents. I knew I loved my siblings. I knew I loved my friends.
I knew I was capable of loving someone, but I really did not know what that meant. I am sure I will continue to learn what it means to love someone unconditionally as the years roll by. I am so glad I get to love Stephen. I am so glad he chose me.
I choose him every single day.
No matter what, I choose him as my partner in life.
I love you, Stephen Barnes.
We celebrated by going out to eat at Los Poblanos farm and then getting tasty gelato.
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