Seventeen and a half half half

 

 I love my sweet Edward.  I love him.  He is my everything.  He is incredible.  He is 17.5 today.  This day almost blinked passed me because so many things have been happening around here.  Edward will be 18 in six months.  I can not believe that he is nearly an adult.  He is responsible.  Kind.  Loving.  Funny.  He still loves airsoft, his job, and his friends.  We ordered sushi and just talked.  Living here at my Dad's house has been great but there are things we miss about having our own house.  This is a crazy transition in our lives and we miss Stephen so much.  

 

Half and Half and Half for Nolen

 In New Mexico, turning 15 and a half is a big deal.  You get your drivers license and can drive alone! I made sure Stephen and I were home to celebrate with Nolen.  We went to the DMV after school and waited for Nolen to get his license. We also took the time to get Edward's real license.  Afterward, we went to menchies for dessert.  

I love my sweet Nolen.  He has done so well in school.  He is so kind and very respectful.  He is easy going and is always up for a good time.  I do have to push him to get out the door but he will always go if I try.  He has worked hard on his roblox game and has made a fair amount of money this year.  He has been trying to make a new game and hopes it goes viral like his other game, RNG arena.  I adore him.  

 

14.5 For Nolen

 My sweet Nolen celebrated his half birthday today!  We went and got frozen yogurt at menchies.  I haven't missed a photo of the boys on their half birthday's yet, but it is getting harder and harder to remember.  Nolen is so sweet.  I love him.  He has been making games on Roblox and making a decent amount of money.  He walks the neighbors dog every other day and has made a small chunk of change.  He has more money than I did at 14.  I signed him up for school this fall and it seems to have caused him a great amount of stress.  I am hoping he will make some friends and get outside of his comfort zone.  

I love this sweet boy of mine.  

 

Fifteen and a half!

 

My sweet beautiful Edward is 15 and a half!  I love him.  He is hilarious and full of deep wisdom.  He has always had an older soul to me and that hasn't changed.  Edward is in 10th grade this year and attending Albuquerque Aviation Academy (or SAMS) as it was known for the last 10 years.  He is loving it.  This year he is taking ground school.  He is so excited to actually start flying this year.  I know he will do his best. His goal is to be a pilot when he is an adult.  

Edward loves airsoft.  He spends all his time and money on airsoft.  Here in Albuquerque they only have one airsoft field and it has games every other Saturday.  If the games were every Saturday, Edward would be there!  He loves it.  

I am so honored to be his mother.  This year has been more challenging for me as I have looked deeper into the Mormon religion and have seen it through different eyes.  Edward didn't like seminary so he is no longer attending.  He doesn't want to become a priest and he doesn't want to go to church any more.  I understand where he is coming from now.  I was so full of fear before but now I see a completely different possibility for my children and I am living without fear.  I will honor Edward's choice despite my apprehensions.  I am so wrapped up in what people think about me as a mother.  I didn't realize how much of my identity was built by how I parent.  That has changed this year.  I have changed and I hope it is for the better.  

Edward, if your reading this as an adult, know that I love you.  I have always tried to do my very best with the knowledge I was given.  I want nothing more than a beautiful life for you and I want to be a part of it in any way possible.  I love you.  

13 and a half

 Today, my sweet Nolen is thirteen and a half. Which means he is half way to fourteen! I just can’t believe how grown up he is now. I used to worry about this time in his life and turns out, I worried for absolutely no reason. He is a wonderful boy. He is helpful and honest. He is kind and silly. He loves to make people laugh and his jokes crack me up. 

We didn’t do anything special today. I am so grateful for my sweet Nolen. I love him! He wants to be done running and I am finally ok with that. I haven’t wanted him to let running go but I realize that is my dream and not his. He is thinking about doing jiu jitsu and that seems like a necessary change of pace for our family. 

Happy half birthday, Nolen! 

14.5

 It is awfully strange watching your child grow up.  Especially when he is taller and stronger within a matter of months.  Edward is now 5'6" and 145 pounds.  He is a freshman in high school and living his best life.  He is becoming a man.  I even think he is enjoying his life more now that some of those horrible hormones are under control.  Edward loves archery, roblox, minecraft, and his friends.  He still loves eating all the food.  Doesn't matter what the food is, he will try it!  I love that about him.  I love watching him grow up and I try not to be too sad about the days that are behind me.  He is becoming a man right before my eyes.

Twelve and a half

 Oh, how my heart can't take how quickly time passes. Things are so great with my sweet boys and I just want to bottle up every single moment.  Nolen celebrated his half birthday today!  It wasn't much of a celebration because I worked and we went to track practice, and then to dinner with my parents.  We played a new fun game of Uno and I made sure to capture a few photos of Nolen on his half birthday.  We usually go get a treat, but it was not in the cards for us.

Nolen has been working hard at track and math.  Both things he is quite good at and has wanted to improve.  He finished his school year with an 89% in math but really wanted a 90%.  I think that will happen next year when he does pre-algebra.  He is so determined to run a faster mile at track.  He ran a 6:31 at the last meet and was so happy.  He really impresses me with his ability to continue to work hard each and every day.

Thirteen and a half

 I haven't given up on taking a half birthday photo.  I love these sweet boys of mine and capturing their lives is my joy!  I love looking back on these posts over the years.  The boys have changed so much.  Edward is fully in his teen years.  Puberty hit him hard over the last year.  His voice has changed and so has the way he thinks about the world.  He is much more mature.  He is still silly and loves to play alone most days.  He has a good group of friends that he "hangs out" with online.  

Edward is kind.  He is still so kind.  He thinks of others as much as a teenage boy can think of others. He understands the world so much more than I give him credit for.  He is as tall as me now.  He is strong but doesn't like to do any sports.  He wants to play War Thunder all day long.  Edward decided to go back to school this year.  He is attending Sams Academy.  He is loving it so far.  He met some new friends and seems to really be getting along with the teachers. I am hoping and hoping and hoping that three years of home school taught him the importance of his education and taking control of his own learning.  

Edward wants to become a pilot and join the Air force.  He is very undecided about serving a mission but that may change over the years.  He is loving deacons quorum and has a lot of friends at church.  I love his honesty.  I love being his mom.  Edward is just truly amazing.  

For Edward's birthday he went to his friend Titus' house after school then we went to eat at his favorite restaurant, Grass Burger.  It was low key but fun to just talk to him and be a part of his life.